Les Amis des Animaux
From foster to forever home
From foster to forever home
This is a potent question which is silently asked by many a dog in rescue and I was reminded of this by one of our fosterers who has been working with a severely traumatised dog for over a year now. And huge steps have been made. She was describing how this boy who is, still, concerned/nervous about what he perceives as the unknown, or the possibility of a crashing down around his ears, girds his loins and prepares for action. If he were human he’d be taking that deep breath before taking his leap of faith, and you’d be squeezing his hand in reassurance.
Within this anticipatory period which may last only a few seconds, there’s also the glance, the check-in with the human in whom he has placed his trust. That look says – you are there for me, I’m doing my best and “will you catch me if I fall?”. And yes of course you will. It is a concept and practice that is inherent in the art of fostering if we accept that, for the vast majority of dogs, fostering provides not only a haven but also, and most importantly, a safe place for development.
So how do you build that trust? How do you get that check-in that you are there for this dog in your care as s/he prepares to take that next “leap of faith”. Let’s be clear though – what is a leap of faith to a dog can seem like absolutely nothing to us as a human. It can be as simple as going over the threshold in a doorway. For the dog it is moving from the known to the unknown. It is not that the dog has done it once and so why can he not do it again and again. A dog notices/senses so much more than we humans – we are blunt instruments when it comes to taking in our environment. Unless the air is redolent with delightful scent, a smell that has us salivating or retching, we pick up nothing through this particular sense. Though we may be moving from the light of the garden into the dark of the interior of the house, we trust that everything is where it was – the furniture has not moved, the floor does not have a gaping hole. To a dog this is not a possibility when first learning about moving from the light to the dark. It is scary and a concern.
Young puppies in a home environment learn it quickly. For those who missed out on this, it’s a big deal.
So, building the trust . . . again I get lessons daily from wise people and was reminded that humans worrying about whether a dog likes them is not the point. A dog needs to know that YOU like THEM. Not through that jaded word “cuddles” – though they are important – but much more through being in the Realm of the Dog. How does a dog know it is accepted and liked – whilst at the same time not being thoroughly confused by mixed messages? This simple mnemonic could serve as a reminder – because every single time, the ingredients are the same, the quantities vary according to need in order to get the desired result: BOCARA
BOUNDARIES: be clear when setting boundaries – what is and what is not OK.
OBSERVATION: spend timing simply watching and observing reactions to different stimuli – and learn more about the dog from these observations.
CONSISTENCY: dogs don’t understand “nuance” – precision is key. For example – don’t say “sit down” if you just want a sit and will be using the word “down” for another action.
ADJUSTMENT: inwards, outwards, upwards, downwards depending on what you have observed – in other words “know” what your dog needs next – including catching them if they have “fallen”
REPETITION: just because your dog does it well in the garden, does not mean it will do it well in your friend’s living room, or when out on a walk. Repeating is essential.
AFFIRMATION: don’t miss an opportunity to confirm to your dog that what they are doing is what you want. Marking success enthusiastically is the cement of the building process.
And so in every sense and in every way you will be ready to ……
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